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Cat Commandments

Thou shalt not jump onto the keyboard
when thy human is using the computer.
Thou shalt not pull the phone cord out of the back of the modem.
Thou shalt not unroll all of the toilet paper off the roll.

Thou shalt not sit in front of the television or monitor
as thou are not
transparent.
Thou shalt not walk in on a dinner party
and commence licking thy butt.
Thou shalt not lie down with thy butt in thy human's face.

Fast as thou art, thou cannot run through closed doors.
Thou shalt not leap from great heights onto thy human's lap.
Thou shalt not climb on garbage cans with hinged lids,
as thou wilt fall in and
trap thyself.

Thou shalt not reset thy human's alarm clock by walking on it.
Thou shalt not jump onto a seat just as thy human is sitting down.
Thou shalt realize that the house is not a prison
from which to escape at any
opportunity.

Thou shalt not trip thy humans even if they are walking too slow.
Thou shalt not push open the bathroom door
when there are guests in thy house.
Thou shalt remember that thou art a carnivore
and that houseplants are not meat.
Thou shalt show remorse when being scolded.

Pass on to all the cats you know !!
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